Ahhh... Finally, the whiny, sentimental, uptight control freak was gone. Inside my head, I felt and saw nothing but what was mine for the taking. The world looked clear for the first time. I recognized who stood before me, and memories of our past, but I had no emotions towards them. Towards anyone. It was freeing. Liberating.
For my first act as my true self, I went to the pathetic charms shop and did a little redecorating. After torching the basic stock, I started anew and created numerous curses, fit to cause terror, confusion, and pain. Once my shelves were full, I set out to start my new image.
I enjoyed a few men, fondled a few women, let vampires sink their teeth in me, and stabbed a confused, pathetic shifter who claimed to love me, all within a few weeks. One particularly boring evening, I twisted a man and woman's morality, let the skies rain blood, sewed a goody-two-shoes lips shut, made a human man shift at the full moon, and plagued a woman's nightmares with demon-filled visions. All the while, I watched, fascinated, while they struggled to comprehend what had happened. Foolish. Never had I had such fun.
And then, my freedom came to a halt after the annoying shifter and self-righteous fairy stole my soul back from the demon Minias, returning it unwillingly to me...
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Saturday, June 12, 2010
The Demon's Game
Oswald and my trip into the Ever After was brief, but when we returned we both felt overwhelmed and couldn't meet each other's eyes. Yes, Minias had made Oz younger, but it wasn't from the goodness of his cold, disgusting heart. His ulterior motive was to breed a child from Oz and I. Since any child Oz had belonged to Minias, and my blood was the demon's blood, a baby born from us would be Minias' ultimate possession. I was revolted, and I refused to look at either of them when I teleported us out. Oz swore he had no idea that that had been Minias' plan from the beginning, but it didn't matter. The damage was done, and instead of seeing Oz as my best friend, I saw him as a spy, and I pushed him away.
Eventually, the shock wore off, and I realized it was not Oz's fault. I trusted he didn't know. Minias' sick plan was of his own creation and I knew Oz needed to be free of him. Oz was such a kind, warm person, so trusting so lovable, even after all he'd been through. I needed to do something for him.
So I went to the book we'd picked up in the Ever After, the Demonomicon, its meaning roughly translating into the The Book of Eternal Death. I knew to fight evil, you must think evil, and I scourged the book until I found what I hoped was it. A spell to break a powerful curse.
I prepared the spell during the day, collecting the components. I knew it was black magic. I knew it would make my white aura covered in smut and while I wished there was another way, I knew there wasn't. Oz had done so much for me, been there for my business, been there for me when my heart was broken by Severus... He was a true friend. His freedom was worth my tainted aura. Once dusk fell, I set the curse in motion, moving quickly. It would not take long for Minias to register what I was doing. I hoped I had enough time...but I was wrong.
Moments before I was able to finish the curse, Minias appeared, throwing his dark energy at me, paralyzing me. He reached inside me, and pulled away my soul. The pain was excruciating, as though every happy thought, ever emotion other then hate and anger, was ripped out of me.
But once my soul was gone...a new me emerged...
Eventually, the shock wore off, and I realized it was not Oz's fault. I trusted he didn't know. Minias' sick plan was of his own creation and I knew Oz needed to be free of him. Oz was such a kind, warm person, so trusting so lovable, even after all he'd been through. I needed to do something for him.
So I went to the book we'd picked up in the Ever After, the Demonomicon, its meaning roughly translating into the The Book of Eternal Death. I knew to fight evil, you must think evil, and I scourged the book until I found what I hoped was it. A spell to break a powerful curse.
I prepared the spell during the day, collecting the components. I knew it was black magic. I knew it would make my white aura covered in smut and while I wished there was another way, I knew there wasn't. Oz had done so much for me, been there for my business, been there for me when my heart was broken by Severus... He was a true friend. His freedom was worth my tainted aura. Once dusk fell, I set the curse in motion, moving quickly. It would not take long for Minias to register what I was doing. I hoped I had enough time...but I was wrong.
Moments before I was able to finish the curse, Minias appeared, throwing his dark energy at me, paralyzing me. He reached inside me, and pulled away my soul. The pain was excruciating, as though every happy thought, ever emotion other then hate and anger, was ripped out of me.
But once my soul was gone...a new me emerged...
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Now I know...
It’s like jumping, it’s like leaping
It’s like walking on the ceiling
It’s like floating, it’s like flying
Through the air
It’s like soaring, it’s like gliding
It’s a rocket ship you’re riding
It’s a feeling that can take you anywhere
So why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
I don’t know
There was passion, there was laughter
The first morning after
I just couldn’t get my feet to touch the ground
Everytime we were together
We talked about forever
I was certain it was Heaven
We had found
So why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
I don’t know
But you can’t live your life
Walking in the clouds
Sooner or later
You have to come down
It’s like a knife through the heart
When it all comes apart
It’s like someone takes a pin
To your balloon
It’s a hole, it’s a cave
It’s kinda like a grave
When he tells you that he’s found somebody new
So why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Now I know
Now I know
It’s like walking on the ceiling
It’s like floating, it’s like flying
Through the air
It’s like soaring, it’s like gliding
It’s a rocket ship you’re riding
It’s a feeling that can take you anywhere
So why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
I don’t know
There was passion, there was laughter
The first morning after
I just couldn’t get my feet to touch the ground
Everytime we were together
We talked about forever
I was certain it was Heaven
We had found
So why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
I don’t know
But you can’t live your life
Walking in the clouds
Sooner or later
You have to come down
It’s like a knife through the heart
When it all comes apart
It’s like someone takes a pin
To your balloon
It’s a hole, it’s a cave
It’s kinda like a grave
When he tells you that he’s found somebody new
So why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Why they call it falling
Now I know
Now I know
Sunday, May 23, 2010
And then came Oz...
After I was rescued by Memphis and Murphy, I was on edge. Scared of my shadow and constantly flinching when something startled me. I kept my house and shop under spell lockdown and compulsively looked behind me. I didn't sleep, and I didn't eat, and all the while I didn't hear from Severus. Not for the days of my imprisonment, and not for a week after.
So when I arrived home one night, and found a man in my living room... I panicked. Instead of handling it, I froze. He was a short man, pudgy all over, but with kind eyes. Though I didn't trust him, I let him speak. He told me he was a gift to me, from Minias. One who was a pet for me to test my magic on. The idea was appalling. How could Minias own living beings? The man, who was named Oswald, said Minias owned his entire family, for generations, because of a deal his ancestor had made. It disturbed me on many levels. Oswald was a shifter, but cursed to only shift into small animals. Rodents. And his previous owner had been a chef. An awful chef, who forced Oswald to create recipes for him, making him rich beyond his greatest desires. I took pity on Oswald, whom I called Ozzy, or Oz, and let him have one of the apartments above the charm shop, furnishing it and paying him for and work he did for me.
Minias sending me Oz was the greatest gift anyone could have given me. He became my best friend, second only to Memphis, with his easy going manner, witty humor, and inappropriate yet funny jokes. I started to depend on him, especially after Severus disappeared. The day Oz came into my life was the day Severus checked out of it, and with the hole Sev gave me, Ozzy filled.
On the night I finally let Severus go, Oz and I went to Vegas, and the poor guy sang karaoke with me. Together, we belted out some hardcore angry or sad songs. Afterward we drank the night away and got a room at Treasure Island, though, of course, nothing happened. But the next morning, Oz had changed. Physically he looked younger, thinner and... hot. After reconstructing the events, I found Minias was behind Oz's transformation, so him and I planned a trip into the Ever After...
So when I arrived home one night, and found a man in my living room... I panicked. Instead of handling it, I froze. He was a short man, pudgy all over, but with kind eyes. Though I didn't trust him, I let him speak. He told me he was a gift to me, from Minias. One who was a pet for me to test my magic on. The idea was appalling. How could Minias own living beings? The man, who was named Oswald, said Minias owned his entire family, for generations, because of a deal his ancestor had made. It disturbed me on many levels. Oswald was a shifter, but cursed to only shift into small animals. Rodents. And his previous owner had been a chef. An awful chef, who forced Oswald to create recipes for him, making him rich beyond his greatest desires. I took pity on Oswald, whom I called Ozzy, or Oz, and let him have one of the apartments above the charm shop, furnishing it and paying him for and work he did for me.
Minias sending me Oz was the greatest gift anyone could have given me. He became my best friend, second only to Memphis, with his easy going manner, witty humor, and inappropriate yet funny jokes. I started to depend on him, especially after Severus disappeared. The day Oz came into my life was the day Severus checked out of it, and with the hole Sev gave me, Ozzy filled.
On the night I finally let Severus go, Oz and I went to Vegas, and the poor guy sang karaoke with me. Together, we belted out some hardcore angry or sad songs. Afterward we drank the night away and got a room at Treasure Island, though, of course, nothing happened. But the next morning, Oz had changed. Physically he looked younger, thinner and... hot. After reconstructing the events, I found Minias was behind Oz's transformation, so him and I planned a trip into the Ever After...
Friday, May 21, 2010
Worthless...
It wasn't long after my trip from the Ever After that I was contacted by the Magister in Greece by way of letter. She informed me that Emanuel had died and I was to return to Greece and resume my place at the throne! Whirlwind of emotions went through me. I was angry that Emanuel had never made our divorce final, and upset that he'd met his final death. Though I felt no love for him any longer, I didn't wish him dead. But the most prevalent emotion I felt was disbelief that I was still considered the vampire Queen of Greece, when I no longer was a vampire.
I had planned on telling Severus about the letter on the day it came, but after he planned a romantic dinner on the roof, I chickened out. The evening was too perfect, and the setting too beautiful to waste on just disappointing news. So I kept it in. Then, when I went home the next day, I was attacked, kidnapped, knocked out and dragged off to a warehouse in Greece. I was awoken by a hideous vampire named Aniketos, and his magister, Malina. Bound by chains and sunk in a tank of water with only my head above it, I was helpless. Without a connection to the earth, I could not tap into a ley line. For three days...three long horrible days, Aniketos and Malina did unspeakable things to me. Tortured me, drank from me, beat me within an inch of my life, then forced me to drink Aniketos blood to heal, and bond me to him. Their plan was to force me to marry him, turn me back into a vampire, and then give him the title of King of Greece. I thought I would die. I begged to die. I wanted nothing more than each blow to the head, each bite to the neck, each broken bone, to just kill me. I cried for Memphis, and I cried for Severus... Three days I was tortured. On the night of the third day, Malina brought to me my sister, Kristin. Finally, I was broken. I bowed to them, letting them do what they wanted without fight. Malina performed the marriage ceremony in front of the vampires of Greece in the caste, and I was dragged away into my old bedroom I shared with Emanuel, prepared to be turned into a vampire, again.
And then it was as if my prayers had been answered. Memphis and Murphy teleported in, freeing me of my chains. Together, we staked Aniketos and Malina, and I pronounced Murphy King of Greece. He had saved my life, and Greece needed a ruler, so I saw him fit for the job. Memphis and I returned home, leaving Murphy in the castle.
His reign was short-lived however because no more than a day later, Emanuel returned to Greece, from an extended vacation. It seemed Aniketos and Malina were not prepared for this. Emanuel usurped Murphy, throwing him out of the castle. My torture, my pain, was for nothing...
I had planned on telling Severus about the letter on the day it came, but after he planned a romantic dinner on the roof, I chickened out. The evening was too perfect, and the setting too beautiful to waste on just disappointing news. So I kept it in. Then, when I went home the next day, I was attacked, kidnapped, knocked out and dragged off to a warehouse in Greece. I was awoken by a hideous vampire named Aniketos, and his magister, Malina. Bound by chains and sunk in a tank of water with only my head above it, I was helpless. Without a connection to the earth, I could not tap into a ley line. For three days...three long horrible days, Aniketos and Malina did unspeakable things to me. Tortured me, drank from me, beat me within an inch of my life, then forced me to drink Aniketos blood to heal, and bond me to him. Their plan was to force me to marry him, turn me back into a vampire, and then give him the title of King of Greece. I thought I would die. I begged to die. I wanted nothing more than each blow to the head, each bite to the neck, each broken bone, to just kill me. I cried for Memphis, and I cried for Severus... Three days I was tortured. On the night of the third day, Malina brought to me my sister, Kristin. Finally, I was broken. I bowed to them, letting them do what they wanted without fight. Malina performed the marriage ceremony in front of the vampires of Greece in the caste, and I was dragged away into my old bedroom I shared with Emanuel, prepared to be turned into a vampire, again.
And then it was as if my prayers had been answered. Memphis and Murphy teleported in, freeing me of my chains. Together, we staked Aniketos and Malina, and I pronounced Murphy King of Greece. He had saved my life, and Greece needed a ruler, so I saw him fit for the job. Memphis and I returned home, leaving Murphy in the castle.
His reign was short-lived however because no more than a day later, Emanuel returned to Greece, from an extended vacation. It seemed Aniketos and Malina were not prepared for this. Emanuel usurped Murphy, throwing him out of the castle. My torture, my pain, was for nothing...
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Hate me...
I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me? It is I that wanted space
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
I'm sober now for 3 whole months it's one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes crying and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling "make it go away!"
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered "How can you do this to me?"
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me? It is I that wanted space
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
I'm sober now for 3 whole months it's one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes crying and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling "make it go away!"
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered "How can you do this to me?"
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
Saturday, April 3, 2010
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