No I can't take one more step towards you
Cause all that's waiting is regret
And don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
You lost the love I loved the most
I learned to live half alive
And now you want me one more time
And who do you think you are
Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are
I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms
I learned to live half alive
And now you want me one more time
And who do you think you are
Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are
And it took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I would have missed the first time that we kissed
Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back
And who do you think you are
Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all
And who do you think you are
Running around leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all
Who do you think you are
Who do you think you are
Who do you think you are
Saturday, July 24, 2010
I Hate You (My Friend) by John Oszajca
No one here likes you
Go away
Get a clue
Go back to your fucking zoo
Or whatever it is you do
I don't know why
I don't like what's in your eyes
and I'd love to split 'em wide
I could pretend
Can't you understand
I hate you, my friend
And some call it obsession
And some call it pure hate
And others call it pathetic
But some totally relate
I'd rather go to hell
Than shake your hand or wish you well
In case you couldn't tell
Go ahead boy drink your drink
Go ahead boy do your thing
Can you ????
and the words to every song I sing
I could pretend
Can't you understand
I hate you, my friend
And some call it obsession
And some call it pure hate
And others call it pathetic
But some totally relate
No one here likes you
Go away
Get a clue
Go back to your fucking zoo
Or whatever it is you do
I could pretend
Can't you understand
I hate you, my friend
I hate you, my friend
I hate you, my friend
Go away
Get a clue
Go back to your fucking zoo
Or whatever it is you do
I don't know why
I don't like what's in your eyes
and I'd love to split 'em wide
I could pretend
Can't you understand
I hate you, my friend
And some call it obsession
And some call it pure hate
And others call it pathetic
But some totally relate
I'd rather go to hell
Than shake your hand or wish you well
In case you couldn't tell
Go ahead boy drink your drink
Go ahead boy do your thing
Can you ????
and the words to every song I sing
I could pretend
Can't you understand
I hate you, my friend
And some call it obsession
And some call it pure hate
And others call it pathetic
But some totally relate
No one here likes you
Go away
Get a clue
Go back to your fucking zoo
Or whatever it is you do
I could pretend
Can't you understand
I hate you, my friend
I hate you, my friend
I hate you, my friend
Friday, July 23, 2010
IT'S NOT ME
Give it a rest already. Get a new hobby. Fuck with a new person, and leave me alone.
Y'all are dead to me. You never existed. MEANING if someone answers a poll question with a response that you know shouldn't have been on there in the first place, it wasn't me.
If someone says something to you about me, IT'S NOT ME.
If someone asks a question on a formspring, or makes a comment on a tweet, or ANYTHING ELSE, IT'S NOT ME.
Get it?
And before you retaliate, it's not Oz either. He's not on twitter anymore. Believe me, or don't, I honestly don't care. But leave my real life out of it. It's no one's business. Roleplay is about escaping real life so please, shut the fuck up already.
Y'all are dead to me. You never existed. MEANING if someone answers a poll question with a response that you know shouldn't have been on there in the first place, it wasn't me.
If someone says something to you about me, IT'S NOT ME.
If someone asks a question on a formspring, or makes a comment on a tweet, or ANYTHING ELSE, IT'S NOT ME.
Get it?
And before you retaliate, it's not Oz either. He's not on twitter anymore. Believe me, or don't, I honestly don't care. But leave my real life out of it. It's no one's business. Roleplay is about escaping real life so please, shut the fuck up already.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Looking Forward
Much to many's dismay, and others jubilation, I have decided to return. But I've set limitations on my character. For starters, I went through my followers and removed those who have betrayed or hurt me, or those close to them. It's possible if you play a multiple character, I've missed you, so I am sure there are many reading this who I'd rather didn't. I don't want to be a target for jokes and slander anymore. I ask if you have an issue with me, just don't follow. Leave me alone and let me be, because I won't have it.
Having said that, any history Evelyn has had with those individuals is null and void. Her relationships with Emanuel, or Silas/Severus never existed. I didn't sleep with any of their group. I never sold or gave any charms to those I blocked, and I have no memory of them.
There is going to be some changes for Evelyn, which really are for the better. She's still moving on from her breakup with Oswald, so will sometimes be melancholy and miss him, as that's just life. He's a special guy, but for OOC reasons between us, he won't be returning anytime soon.
I know people talk badly about me. I know there are truths, and many lies floating around stream about me. But if you're going to believe any of it without checking out the facts, then you probably weren't a good friend to me in the first place, and I ask that you leave me be. I'll keep my real friends, who I love so much. Really, it's because of them that I'm staying. I love you! You know who you are and how important you are to me, so thank you for sticking through it, and bringing me back. You can make real friendships here, even if it's behind a celebrity face and it took me a few days to realize it. I'm sorry if I've put anyone out by my abrupt departure and hopefully we can move on from this as if it never happened.
Having said that, any history Evelyn has had with those individuals is null and void. Her relationships with Emanuel, or Silas/Severus never existed. I didn't sleep with any of their group. I never sold or gave any charms to those I blocked, and I have no memory of them.
There is going to be some changes for Evelyn, which really are for the better. She's still moving on from her breakup with Oswald, so will sometimes be melancholy and miss him, as that's just life. He's a special guy, but for OOC reasons between us, he won't be returning anytime soon.
I know people talk badly about me. I know there are truths, and many lies floating around stream about me. But if you're going to believe any of it without checking out the facts, then you probably weren't a good friend to me in the first place, and I ask that you leave me be. I'll keep my real friends, who I love so much. Really, it's because of them that I'm staying. I love you! You know who you are and how important you are to me, so thank you for sticking through it, and bringing me back. You can make real friendships here, even if it's behind a celebrity face and it took me a few days to realize it. I'm sorry if I've put anyone out by my abrupt departure and hopefully we can move on from this as if it never happened.
Monday, July 12, 2010
The End
I appreciate the friends I've made here, but I've decided to leave twitter RP. I've been on here for over a year and I've made some good friends, but lately the drama has consumed me. I can't escape it. There are people who intentionally set out to hurt me. Became close to me, let me trust them, when all along their ultimate plan was to mess with me. They succeeded, and I now I can't trust anyone.
Thank you to those who supported Evelyn's storylines. I especially loved how people took to my spells. It was fun, but in the end, we'll all leave sometime, right? Now's my time. I won't be creating any other characters, as I had in the past, but hanging up my RP saddle.
*blows a kiss* Goodbye, friends, frenemies, and heartless bitches.
*bows and exits stage right*
Thank you to those who supported Evelyn's storylines. I especially loved how people took to my spells. It was fun, but in the end, we'll all leave sometime, right? Now's my time. I won't be creating any other characters, as I had in the past, but hanging up my RP saddle.
*blows a kiss* Goodbye, friends, frenemies, and heartless bitches.
*bows and exits stage right*
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Final Goodbyes
I woke up in the pool, struggling to climb out, feeling at first white hot pain, followed by the cool, calming sensation of being made whole again. I was confused as I pulled myself out and laid by the pool, trying hard to catch my breath. Jai ran out, followed by Ozzy and to see him back, not under Minias's control made my eyes water.
Suddenly, all my memories came crashing back front and center to my brain. I remembered cursing my friends, and then, in horror, I remembered stabbing Oz in the stomach. Words started babbling through my lips, apologies on top of apologies, but...something was off. Oz didn't want to hold me, he didn't seem to be happy that I was back. He instead comforted Jai. His arms were around JAI. His look of concern, worry, of LOVE, was at JAI. Even though I was whole and my soul was intact, I broke. I could do nothing but helplessly watch them leave...together. I went back inside, to the shambles that my life had become and cried...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I later learned that Oz wasn't free, and that he was only here because Minias had been put in jail in the Ever After. All of his powers had been stripped and he was trapped there. But he still had control over Oz's entire family. I knew Minias was at his most vulnerable state, and if he were to be killed, now would be the time to do it. So I started to plan...
I researched the Demonomicon, for anything that would kill a demon, and learned a special blade would destroy his body. I closed my eyes, letting tears fall down as the realization of what would happen to me when Minias died settled in. His blood flowed through my veins, our connection was through a demon blood. If he was destroyed, then so would I be.
It didn't matter. I wouldn't let it. For all that Oz had done for me, for the pain I caused him when I stabbed him, both physical and emotional, he deserved to be free. I did not believe I deserved to die, but I knew I loved him with all my heart and his life was worth more than mine.
The night proceeding my trip into the Ever After, Jai called me. She said she needed to talk, so I met her in France, at a cute Paris bistro. She told me she suspected Oz was in love with me, that she felt it even though he wasn't even aware. That little bit of information gave me peace, and solidified my plans. I told her she needed to be there for him, and she complied, though I didn't tell her why he would need her. I didn't doubt that she would make him happy after I was gone. She was a good friend to me, and I knew at least a part of him loved her, and that part would grow. They would be happy.
I returned home, and wrote down a brief list of how my belongings should be separated. I didn't have much, but I made sure to give what I had to Oz, Memphis, Jai, and my mother and sister. On my wrist, I wore the bracelet from my mother, that was engraved with my name, needing her strength. I left Oz a letter (http://twitpic.com/1rg150) and packed my bag, full of candles, and protection spells before teleporting into the Ever After.
I arrived in an empty field, setting two circles strong circles before sitting down in the center. I had only once before summoned Minias, and that was when I cashed in on his favor to me, the one that brought me back to life, but I knew his full summoning name. Minias Dornban Wenoin. When I opened my eyes, he stood before me, his hands shackled by iron cuffs that I knew were enchanted. He could not move, but the smirk on his face showed he was not scared of me. No doubt he thought I had come to free him, but as I pulled the blade from my bag, he lost his smile. "You plan on killing me, little witch? You'll die too", he said, then laughed. But I knew that. I said so and I saw the understanding then fear flash over his face. I didn't make him wait long before driving the blade through his chest. His body fell to the ground, and instantly I felt my blood begin to boil, and in my head I heard his voice. He was possessing me, like I knew he would. I'd prepared a spell, and all it needed was a trigger word. I closed my eyes and held onto my aura, and the same time murmuring Latin. My body lit on fire from the inside out, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think, all I could do was feel myself burn to ashes... And we died....
Suddenly, all my memories came crashing back front and center to my brain. I remembered cursing my friends, and then, in horror, I remembered stabbing Oz in the stomach. Words started babbling through my lips, apologies on top of apologies, but...something was off. Oz didn't want to hold me, he didn't seem to be happy that I was back. He instead comforted Jai. His arms were around JAI. His look of concern, worry, of LOVE, was at JAI. Even though I was whole and my soul was intact, I broke. I could do nothing but helplessly watch them leave...together. I went back inside, to the shambles that my life had become and cried...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I later learned that Oz wasn't free, and that he was only here because Minias had been put in jail in the Ever After. All of his powers had been stripped and he was trapped there. But he still had control over Oz's entire family. I knew Minias was at his most vulnerable state, and if he were to be killed, now would be the time to do it. So I started to plan...
I researched the Demonomicon, for anything that would kill a demon, and learned a special blade would destroy his body. I closed my eyes, letting tears fall down as the realization of what would happen to me when Minias died settled in. His blood flowed through my veins, our connection was through a demon blood. If he was destroyed, then so would I be.
It didn't matter. I wouldn't let it. For all that Oz had done for me, for the pain I caused him when I stabbed him, both physical and emotional, he deserved to be free. I did not believe I deserved to die, but I knew I loved him with all my heart and his life was worth more than mine.
The night proceeding my trip into the Ever After, Jai called me. She said she needed to talk, so I met her in France, at a cute Paris bistro. She told me she suspected Oz was in love with me, that she felt it even though he wasn't even aware. That little bit of information gave me peace, and solidified my plans. I told her she needed to be there for him, and she complied, though I didn't tell her why he would need her. I didn't doubt that she would make him happy after I was gone. She was a good friend to me, and I knew at least a part of him loved her, and that part would grow. They would be happy.
I returned home, and wrote down a brief list of how my belongings should be separated. I didn't have much, but I made sure to give what I had to Oz, Memphis, Jai, and my mother and sister. On my wrist, I wore the bracelet from my mother, that was engraved with my name, needing her strength. I left Oz a letter (http://twitpic.com/1rg150) and packed my bag, full of candles, and protection spells before teleporting into the Ever After.
I arrived in an empty field, setting two circles strong circles before sitting down in the center. I had only once before summoned Minias, and that was when I cashed in on his favor to me, the one that brought me back to life, but I knew his full summoning name. Minias Dornban Wenoin. When I opened my eyes, he stood before me, his hands shackled by iron cuffs that I knew were enchanted. He could not move, but the smirk on his face showed he was not scared of me. No doubt he thought I had come to free him, but as I pulled the blade from my bag, he lost his smile. "You plan on killing me, little witch? You'll die too", he said, then laughed. But I knew that. I said so and I saw the understanding then fear flash over his face. I didn't make him wait long before driving the blade through his chest. His body fell to the ground, and instantly I felt my blood begin to boil, and in my head I heard his voice. He was possessing me, like I knew he would. I'd prepared a spell, and all it needed was a trigger word. I closed my eyes and held onto my aura, and the same time murmuring Latin. My body lit on fire from the inside out, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think, all I could do was feel myself burn to ashes... And we died....
The black Abyss
Ahhh... Finally, the whiny, sentimental, uptight control freak was gone. Inside my head, I felt and saw nothing but what was mine for the taking. The world looked clear for the first time. I recognized who stood before me, and memories of our past, but I had no emotions towards them. Towards anyone. It was freeing. Liberating.
For my first act as my true self, I went to the pathetic charms shop and did a little redecorating. After torching the basic stock, I started anew and created numerous curses, fit to cause terror, confusion, and pain. Once my shelves were full, I set out to start my new image.
I enjoyed a few men, fondled a few women, let vampires sink their teeth in me, and stabbed a confused, pathetic shifter who claimed to love me, all within a few weeks. One particularly boring evening, I twisted a man and woman's morality, let the skies rain blood, sewed a goody-two-shoes lips shut, made a human man shift at the full moon, and plagued a woman's nightmares with demon-filled visions. All the while, I watched, fascinated, while they struggled to comprehend what had happened. Foolish. Never had I had such fun.
And then, my freedom came to a halt after the annoying shifter and self-righteous fairy stole my soul back from the demon Minias, returning it unwillingly to me...
For my first act as my true self, I went to the pathetic charms shop and did a little redecorating. After torching the basic stock, I started anew and created numerous curses, fit to cause terror, confusion, and pain. Once my shelves were full, I set out to start my new image.
I enjoyed a few men, fondled a few women, let vampires sink their teeth in me, and stabbed a confused, pathetic shifter who claimed to love me, all within a few weeks. One particularly boring evening, I twisted a man and woman's morality, let the skies rain blood, sewed a goody-two-shoes lips shut, made a human man shift at the full moon, and plagued a woman's nightmares with demon-filled visions. All the while, I watched, fascinated, while they struggled to comprehend what had happened. Foolish. Never had I had such fun.
And then, my freedom came to a halt after the annoying shifter and self-righteous fairy stole my soul back from the demon Minias, returning it unwillingly to me...
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